Sweet MYTH-tery of Life by Robert Asprin

There were strings of garlic—fake, to look at it—as well as vials of water and strings of beads, all marked with various religious symbols. Not exactly what I’d pick to have around while I was trying to relax … if I were a vampire. Then again, the objective of the place didn’t seem to be to provide relaxation.

“Interesting decor,” I said, still looking at the stuff on the walls. “What’s the name of this place, anyway?”

“It’s called The Wooden Stake,” Cassandra supplied, giving a mock shudder as she hugged my arm even tighter. “Isn’t it a gas?”

“Uh-huh,” I managed noncommittally.

Actually, her little shudder was quite distracting . . . particularly crowded as close to me as she was.

“Quite a crowd here,” I added, forcibly pulling my eyes away from her to look around again.

“I told you it was the hottest club around,” she said, giving my arm a small shake. “Look. Everybody’s here.”

If it seems that I’ve been dwelling on the physical description of the club, it’s because I’ve been hesitant to tackle the job of describing the patrons. They were like something out of your worse nightmare . . . literally.

As might be expected, there were vampires. If their red eyes and flashy clothes didn’t give them away, there was always the minor detail that they tended to float above the dance floor and along the ceiling to get away from the crush of the other dancers.

The list didn’t stop there, however.

There were ‘weres’ around. Not just werewolves, but were-tigers, were-bears, and were-snakes as well. There were also mummies, lizard men, a night-shambler or two, and even a couple ghosts. At least, you could see through them so I supposed they were ghosts.