Handle this right, Sam, and you might do yourself some good. It’s not impossible.
No. It wasn’t. Unlikely, of course, but not impossible. And there was something else, quite aside from the shadow politics which might or might not attend a Friday-night Rotary Club speaker’s meeting: he had always prided himself on doing the best job possible. So it was just a dumb little speech. So what?
Also, it’s just a dumb little small-town library. What’s the big deal? There aren’t even any bushes growing along the sides.
Sam had started up the walk again, but now he stopped with a frown creasing his forehead. That was a strange thought to have; it seemed to have come right out of nowhere. So there were no bushes growing along the sides of the Library -what difference did that make? He didn’t know … but he did know it had an almost magical effect on him. His uncharacteristic hesitation fell away and he began to move forward once more. He climbed the four stone steps and paused for a moment. The place felt deserted, somehow. He
grasped the door-handle and thought, I bet it’s locked. I bet the place is closed Friday afternoons. There was something strangely comforting in this thought.
But the old-fashioned latch-plate depressed under his thumb, and the heavy door swung noiselessly inward.
Sam stepped into a small foyer with a marble floor in checkerboard black and white squares. An easel stood in the center of this antechamber. There was a sign propped on the easel; the message consisted of one word in very large letters.
SILENCE!
it read. Not
SILENCE IS GOLDEN
or
QUIET, PLEASE
but just that one staring, glaring word:
SILENCE!
‘You bet,’ Sam said. He only murmured the words, but the acoustics of the place were very good, and his low murmur was magnified into a grouchy grumble that made him cringe. It actually seemed to bounce back at him from the high ceiling. At that moment he felt as if he was in the fourth grade again, and about to be called to task by Mrs Glasters for cutting up rough at exactly the wrong moment. He looked around uneasily, half-expecting an ill-natured librarian to come swooping out of the main room to see who had dared profane the silence.
Stop it, for Christ’s sake. You’re forty years old. Fourth grade was a long time ago, buddy.
Except it didn’t seem like a long time ago. Not in here. In here, fourth grade seemed almost close enough to reach out and touch.
He crossed the marble floor to the left of the easel, unconsciously walking with his weight thrown forward so the heels of his loafers would not click, and entered the main lobby of the Junction City Library.
There were a number of glass globes hanging down from the ceiling (which was at least twenty feet higher than the ceiling of the foyer), but none of them were on. The light was provided by two large, angled skylights. On a sunny day these would have been quite enough to light the room; they might even have rendered it cheery and welcoming. But this Friday was overcast and dreary, and the light was dim. The corners of the lobby were filled with gloomy webs of shadow.
What Sam Peebles felt was a sense of wrongness. It was as if he had done more than step through a door and cross a foyer; he felt as if he had entered another world, one which bore absolutely no resemblance to the small Iowa town that he sometimes liked, sometimes hated, but mostly just took for granted. The air in here seemed heavier than normal air, and did not seem to conduct light as well as normal air did. The silence was thick as a blanket, as cold as snow.
The library was deserted.
Shelves of books stretched above him on every side. Looking up toward the skylights with their crisscrosses of reinforcing wire made Sam a little dizzy, and he had a momentary illusion: he felt that he was upside down, that he had been hung by his heels over a deep square pit lined with books.
Ladders leaned against the walls here and there, the kind that were mounted on tracks and rolled along the floor on rubber wheels. Two wooden islands broke the lake of space between the place where he stood and the checkout desk on the far side of the large, high room. One was a long oak magazine rack. Periodicals, each encased in a clear plastic cover, hung from this rack on wooden dowels. They looked like the hides of strange animals which had been left to cure in this silent room. A sign mounted on top of the rack commanded:
RETURN ALL MAGAZINES TO THEIR PROPER PLACES!
To the left of the magazine rack was a shelf of brand-new novels and nonfiction books. The sign mounted on top of the shelf proclaimed them to be seven-day rentals.
Sam passed down the wide aisle between the magazines and the seven-day bookshelf, his heels rapping and echoing in spite of his effort to move quietly. He found himself wishing he had heeded his original impulse to just turn around and go back to the office. This place was spooky. Although there was a small, hooded microfilm camera alight and humming on the desk, there was no one manning – or womaning – it. A small plaque reading
A. LORTZ
stood on the desk, but there was no sign of A. Lortz or anyone else.
Probably taking a dump and checking out the new issue of Library journal.
Sam felt a crazy desire to open his mouth and yell, ‘Everything coming out all right, A. Lortz?’ It passed quickly. The Junction City Public Library was not the sort of place that encouraged amusing sallies.
Sam’s thoughts suddenly spun back to a little rhyme from his childhood. NO more laughing, no more fun; Quaker meeting has begun. If you show your teeth or tongue, you must pay a forfeit.
If you show your teeth or tongue in here, does A. Lortz make you pay a forfeit?
he wondered. He looked around again, let his nerve-endings feel the frowning quality of the silence, and thought you could make book on it.
No longer interested in obtaining a joke-book or Best Loved Poems of the American People, but fascinated by the library’s suspended, dreamy atmosphere in spite of himself, Sam walked toward a door to the right of the seven-day books. A sign over the door said this was the Children’s Library. Had he used the Children’s Library when he had been growing up in St Louis? He thought so, but those memories were hazy, distant, and hard to hold. All the same, approaching the door of the Children’s Library gave him an odd and haunting feeling. It was almost like coming home.
The door was closed. On it was a picture of Little Red Riding Hood, looking down at the wolf in Grandma’s bed. The wolf was wearing Grandma’s nightgown and Grandma’s nightcap. It was snarling.
Foam dripped from between its bared fangs. An expression of almost exquisite horror had transfixed Little Red Riding Hood’s face, and the poster seemed not just to suggest but to actually proclaim that the happy ending of this story – of all fairy tales – was a convenient lie. Parents might believe such guff, Red Riding Hood’s ghastly-sick face said, but the little ones knew better, didn’t they?
Nice, Sam thought. With a poster like that on the door, I bet lots of kids use the Children’s Library. I bet the little ones are especially fond of it.
He opened the door and poked his head in.
His sense of unease left him; he was charmed at once. The poster on the door was all wrong, of course, but what was behind it seemed perfectly right. Of course he had used the library as a child; it only took one look into this scale-model world to refresh those memories. His father had died young; Sam had been an only child raised by a working mother he rarely saw except on Sundays and holidays. When he could not promote money for a movie after school – and that was often – the library had to do, and the room he saw now brought those days back in a sudden wave of nostalgia that was sweet and painful and obscurely frightening.
It had been a small world, and this was a small world; it had been a well-lighted world, even on the grimmest, rainiest days, and so was this one. No hanging glass globes for this room; there were shadow-banishing fluorescent lights behind frosted panels in the suspended ceiling, and all of them were on. The tops of the tables were only two feet from the floor; the seats of the chairs were even closer. In this world the adults would be the interlopers, the uncomfortable aliens. They would balance the tables on their knees if they tried to sit at them, and they would be apt to crack their skulls bending to drink from the water fountain which was mounted on the far wall.