A Darkness in my Soul by Dean R. Koontz

There was a blue field of sparks crackling above his

head, and psychic energies shot thin sporadic flames from

his nostrils, the steam to hang there afterwards.

“Leave a monster his only privacy!”

I too am a monster.

“Look at your face, Monster. It is not wrinkled like a

dried fig; it is not old beyond its years with seeing; it is not

caked with the dust of unlived centuries. You pass for

human in your world. You pass. At least, you pass.”

Child, listen to me. I am—

He charged and grasped at me with hoof-hands. I

fashioned a sword from my own fields of thought and

smashed him broadside on the head.

The sound rang in the stone corridors.

My arm reverberated with the force of the blow.

And he was gone, a vapor in the darkness, a phantom.

Holding the green glow of the weapon, I advanced

slowly down the twisting halls toward the inner part of

him, where his theories would bubble, where thoughts

would run in molten rivers. I came out, finally, on an

earthen shelf above a yawning pit. Far below, eternities

away, drifting and glowing, was a circular mass, and the

heat it threw into my face was great.

From here had come the Minotaur. From here came

everything.

I reached out and grasped for anything, a subcur-

rent, a cracked image, the shell of a daydream, and I

caught a Hate River ebbing and flowing. HATE, HATE,

HATE HATEHATEHATEHATE-HA-TE-HATEHATE

HATE . . . Somewhere in the middle of it, a two-headed

thing swam, cutting the foul waters with a viciously spined

neck. I caught the “T” in HATE and traced it along the

currents, searching. T leads ToThumb and a suckling

mouTh . . . and The sucking mouTh suddenly To a brown

nipple and a moTher’s breasT . . . and again The T

dominaTed . . . and I allowed The river To carry me

ineviTably on Toward Theorem. . . .

Theory Through Tees … Through Thousand Times

Tedious Tiring . . . Ten Times one Times Two To Sub-

OughT-seven in drepshler Tubes now being used . . .

The flood was too fast. I could see the theory, but I

could not divert it fast enough toward the ocean in the

distance where a waterspout whirled (taking the thoughts

to the little bit of conscious mind he possessed). The

thoughts that were now being spoken in dust whispers in a

room far away—the thoughts being recorded by serious

men with serious faces who listened, no doubt, quite

seriously.

Then the drug must have finally taken hold of him, or I

would have been swallowed alive by a mind construct and

destroyed in his cauldron of insanity. The two-headed

beast had swum near without drawing my notice. It

caught my eye, now, as it moved swiftly, its mouth

gaping, a giant cave that drooled. . . .

I lifted my sword as it raised its huge head above me to

strike. Then there was a sudden, jerky slip like an old

movie reel that has been spliced, and everything went into

slow motion. It was like an underwater ballet. At that

rate, it would have taken an hour for the beast’s jaws to

reach me and snap me up, and I slew him as his red eyes

glistened and as a strange THRIDDLE THRIDDLE

came out of his throat. Or hers.

Turning back toward the river, I directed thoughts

toward the slow-moving waterspout until so much time

had passed that I thought I had better get out before I lost

my own character identity.

I turned away from the screaming Id pit.

I walked back the gray tunnel.

Cobwebs brushed my face.

But there were stairs leading upward this time….

VI

There were candles in her green eyes, reflections of

those on the table. The same flickering amber glinted from

her hair, made the smooth flesh of her one bared shoulder

glow with health. Her sequined, well-cut, Oriental some-

thing-or-other was dazzling.

“I’d want nothing held back,” she said over the remains

of two Cornish game hens of that special diminutive and

fleshy mutant strain. Bones and gravy contrasted with her

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