No! You’ll spoil it/me! I can’t! Don’t you see my
station, my purpose, my nature? It must be my purpose! I
haven’t got another one, there isn’t another one, this must
be it! Get away from me! No!
WHAT IS IT? WHO DO YOU SEE?
Melinda. Floating, naked. Floating toward the cross. No!
Stay away! You’ll spoil my purpose!
STOP IT.
Help! Help me! Don’t let her touch me! Forgod’ssake-
she’snaked … naked … nakednakednakednaked!
STOP DREAMING! WAKE! LISTEN TO ME; HOLD
YOURSELF TOGETHER AND LISTEN TO ME.
I—
QUIET. COMPOSE YOURSELF. I WILL INTER-
PRET YOUR DREAM. THOUGH I MUST SAY THAT
THIS THROWS A NEW LIGHT ON YOUR PSYCHE.
DO YOU SEE WHY YOU ARE THE ONE ON THE
CROSS? NO NEED FOR AN ANSWER, PURELY
RHETORICAL. YOU SEE YOURSELF AS CHRIST—
WHAT A NEW DEVELOPMENT!—MORE PRECISE-
LY, AS THE INCARNATION OF CHRIST AS REP-
RESENTED BY THE SECOND COMING. THERE
ARE PARALLELS, OF COURSE, BETWEEN YOUR
CONDITION AND THE STORY OF THE CHRIST.
YOU COULD SAY THAT YOUR OWN BIRTH WAS A
VIRGIN BIRTH, FOR EXAMPLE. YOU WERE NOT
CONCEIVED BY FLESH IN FLESH AND THE SPILL-
ING OF SEED, BUT BY THE GENETIC ENGINEERS
AND THE COMPLEX CYBERNETIC ARTIFICIAL
WOMBS. AND THERE ARE YOUR SUPER-HUMAN
POWERS. PERHAPS THEY ARE NOT AS ALL-EN-
COMPASSING AS THOSE OF THE CHRIST MYTH,
BUT THEY ARE SUFFICIENTLY STRONG TO NUR-
TURE YOUR DELUSIONS.
YOU WERE NOT ABLE TO SEE A PURPOSE TO
YOUR LIFE, SO YOU CHOSE TO CAST YOURSELF
IN THE ROLE OF A SAVIOUR. IT SERVES A DOU-
BLE PURPOSE: FIRST, IT REINFORCES ALL YOUR
CHRISTIAN MORES, ALL THE THINGS THEY
THOUGHT YOU SHOULD BELIEVE AS YOU WERE
RAISED (THOUGH THEY WERE AS INTERESTED
IN SUPPLYING YOU WITH MORES THAT WOULD
KEEP YOU IN LINE AS MUCH AS THEY CARED
ABOUT YOUR HAVING A CHRISTIAN UPBRING-
ING); SECONDLY, IT GIVES A PURPOSE AND
MEANING NOT ONLY TO YOUR LIFE BUT TO THE
ENTIRE UNIVERSE WHICH SOMETIMES SEEMS
UNEXPLAINABLY CHAOTIC TO YOU—THE WARS
AND THE SUFFERING, THE REST OF IT.
/ am thirsty.
IN A MOMENT. I MUST FINISH WITH THIS FIRST.
YOU SEE MORSFAGEN CASTING DICE, FOR HE
DESPISED AND ONLY USES YOU FOR HIS OWN
ENDS. THE CLOAK SYMBOLIZES YOUR LIFE,
YOUR PURPOSE, YOUR INDIVIDUAL IDENTITY.
THERE SEEMS TO BE A HINT OF THE FUTURE IN
YOUR DREAM, A MOMENT OF CLAIRVOYANCE,
AND YOU SHOULD BEWARE THE MAN.
Go on.
YOU SEE CHILD AS A THREAT TO YOUR NEAT-
LY BUILT THEORY. HE IS ANOTHER VIRGIN
BIRTH, OF THE ORIGIN THAT YOU ARE OF. YOU
REALIZE THAT HE HAD BUILT THE SAME SEC-
OND-COMING THEORY TO EXPLAIN HIS OWN
PURPOSE IN THE WORLD. YOU UNDERSTAND
THAT SINCE HE HAS MET YOU, HIS LIFE PUR-
POSE HAS BEEN SHATTERED AND THAT HE IS
HUNTING FOR ANOTHER ANSWER. YOU DON’T
WANT TO HAVE TO DO THAT YOURSELF. YOU
DON’T WANT TO HUNT.
THE WOMAN, MELINDA, IS ALSO A THREAT TO
YOUR PURPOSE (OR, RATHER, TO THE FANTASY
PURPOSE YOU HAVE CREATED FOR YOURSELF).
CHRIST COULD NOT FALL PHYSICALLY IN LOVE
WITH A WOMAN. BUT YOU HAVE. ADMIT IT. THIS
IS YOUR PURPOSE IN LIFE. LISTEN AND KNOW
THAT YOUR PURPOSE IS TO LOVE AND COMFORT
AND TO BE LOVED IN RETURN. OTHERWISE, YOU
FACE ONLY SCHIZOPHRENIA.
Could that be a purpose, though?
IT IS THE OLDEST PURPOSE. WASH YOURSELF
CLEAN OF FALSE PURPOSES. ALLOW ME TO ES-
TABLISH A SERIES OF PERSONALITY TAPES TO
REINFORCE YOUR FALTERING SENSE OF REALI-
TY AND TO SUBDUE THIS CHRIST SYNDROME.
THE REASON YOU LIVE IS TO LOVE. SO IT IS
WITH MOST HUMAN BEINGS. DON’T SEARCH
FOR A LARGE PURPOSE, FOR MORE COMPLEX
MEANINGS, FOR THE WHY OF THE WORLD OR
THE REASON IN HATE AND WAR. BE SATISFIED
THAT YOU KNOW YOURSELF. IT IS A WISE MAN
WHO KNOWS HIMSELF.
WE WILL PROCEED WITH THE HEALING
NOW….
VII
The following morning, as I stepped out of the elevator
near the top of the AC complex, Harry intercepted me
before I had taken more than four steps toward the room
where Child waited for another session. His round face
was drawn, pale, and lined with heavy creases that had
not been there before. He looked as if he had not slept all