Christian Science by Mark Twain

2. Her people built the Mother-Church edifice on it, at a cost of two

hundred and fifty thousand dollars.

3. Then they gave the whole property to her.

4. Then she gave it to the Board of Directors. She is the Board of

Directors. She took it out of one pocket and put it in the other.

5. Sec. 10 (of the deed). “Whenever said Directors shall determine

that it is inexpedient to maintain preaching, reading, or speaking in

said church in accordance with the terms of this deed, they are

authorized and required to reconvey forthwith said lot of land with the

building thereon to Mary Baker G. Eddy, her heirs and assigns forever,

by a proper deed of conveyance.”

She is never careless, never slipshod, about a matter of business.

Owning the property through her Board of Waxworks was safe enough, still

it was sound business to set another grip on it to cover accidents, and

she did it. Her barkers (what a curious name; I wonder if it is

copyrighted); her barkers persistently advertise to the public her

generosity in giving away a piece of land which cost her a trifle, and a

two–hundred–and–fifty–thousand–dollar church which cost her nothing;

and they can hardly speak of the unselfishness of it without breaking

down and crying; yet they know she gave nothing away, and never intended

to. However, such is the human race. Often it does seem such a pity

that Noah and his party did not miss the boat.

Some of the hostiles think that Mrs. Eddy’s idea in protecting this

property in the interest of her heirs, and in accumulating a great money

fortune, is, that she may leave her natural heirs well provided for when

she goes. I think it is a mistake. I think she is of late years giving

herself large concern about only one interest-her power and glory, and

the perpetuation and worship of her Name–with a capital N. Her Church

is her pet heir, and I think it will get her wealth. It is the torch

which is to light the world and the ages with her glory.

I think she once prized money for the ease and comfort it could bring,

the showy vanities it could furnish, and the social promotion it could

command; for we have seen that she was born into the world with little

ways and instincts and aspirations and affectations that are duplicates

of our own. I do not think her money-passion has ever diminished in

ferocity, I do not think that she has ever allowed a dollar that had no

friends to get by her alive, but I think her reason for wanting it has

changed. I think she wants it now to increase and establish and

perpetuate her power and glory with, not to add to her comforts and

luxuries, not to furnish paint and fuss and feathers for vain display. I

think her ambitions have soared away above the fuss-and-feather stage.

She still likes the little shows and vanities–a fact which she exposed

in a public utterance two or three days ago when she was not noticing–

but I think she does not place a large value upon them now. She could

build a mighty and far-shining brass-mounted palace if she wanted to, but

she does not do it. She would have had that kind of an ambition in the

early scrabbling times. She could go to England to-day and be worshiped

by earls, and get a comet’s attention from the million, if she cared for

such things. She would have gone in the early scrabbling days for much

less than an earl, and been vain of it, and glad to show off before the

remains of the Scotch kin. But those things are very small to her now–

next to invisible, observed through the cloud-rack from the dizzy summit

where she perches in these great days. She does not want that church

property for herself. It is worth but a quarter of a million–a sum she

could call in from her far-spread flocks to-morrow with a lift of her

hand. Not a squeeze of it, just a lift. It would come without a murmur;

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