LIFE ON THE MISSISSIPPI BY MARK TWAIN

him to sell another. Other persons of his profession must,

however, have been less scrupulous; for the book was read

in city, town, village, and hamlet, steamboat, and stage-coach,

and a sort of war-whoop was sent forth perfectly unprecedented

in my recollection upon any occasion whatever.

An ardent desire for approbation, and a delicate sensitiveness under censure,

have always, I believe, been considered as amiable traits of character;

but the condition into which the appearance of Captain Hall’s work threw

the republic shows plainly that these feelings, if carried to excess,

produce a weakness which amounts to imbecility.

It was perfectly astonishing to hear men who, on other subjects,

were of some judgment, utter their opinions upon this.

I never heard of any instance in which the commonsense generally

found in national criticism was so overthrown by passion.

I do not speak of the want of justice, and of fair and

liberal interpretation: these, perhaps, were hardly to be expected.

Other nations have been called thin-skinned, but the citizens

of the Union have, apparently, no skins at all; they wince if a

breeze blows over them, unless it be tempered with adulation.

It was not, therefore, very surprising that the acute and forcible

observations of a traveler they knew would be listened to should be

received testily. The extraordinary features of the business were,

first, the excess of the rage into which they lashed themselves;

and, secondly, the puerility of the inventions by which they

attempted to account for the severity with which they fancied they

had been treated.

Not content with declaring that the volumes contained no word of truth,

from beginning to end (which is an assertion I heard made very nearly

as often as they were mentioned), the whole country set to work

to discover the causes why Captain Hall had visited the United States,

and why he had published his book.

I have heard it said with as much precision and gravity

as if the statement had been conveyed by an official report,

that Captain Hall had been sent out by the British Government

expressly for the purpose of checking the growing admiration

of England for the Government of the United States,–

that it was by a commission from the treasury he had come,

and that it was only in obedience to orders that he had found

anything to object to.

I do not give this as the gossip of a coterie; I am persuaded that it

is the belief of a very considerable portion of the country.

So deep is the conviction of this singular people that they cannot

be seen without being admired, that they will not admit the possibility

that any one should honestly and sincerely find aught to disapprove

in them or their country.

The American Reviews are, many of them, I believe, well known in England;

I need not, therefore, quote them here, but I sometimes wondered

that they, none of them, ever thought of translating Obadiah’s

curse into classic American; if they had done so, on placing

(he, Basil Hall) between brackets, instead of (he, Obadiah)

it would have saved them a world of trouble.

I can hardly describe the curiosity with which I sat down at length

to peruse these tremendous volumes; still less can I do justice to my

surprise at their contents. To say that I found not one exaggerated

statement throughout the work is by no means saying enough.

It is impossible for any one who knows the country not to see that

Captain Hall earnestly sought out things to admire and commend.

When he praises, it is with evident pleasure; and when he finds fault,

it is with evident reluctance and restraint, excepting where motives

purely patriotic urge him to state roundly what it is for the benefit

of his country should be known.

In fact, Captain Hall saw the country to the greatest possible advantage.

Furnished, of course, with letters of introduction to the most

distinguished individuals, and with the still more influential

recommendation of his own reputation, he was received in full

drawing-room style and state from one end of the Union to the other.

He saw the country in full dress, and had little or no opportunity

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