Another Fine Myth by Robert Asprin

We had hidden the demon hunter just outside of town .. . well, actually we buried him. I had been shocked by the suggestion at first, but as Aahz pointed out, the statue didn’t need any air and it was the only surefire way we had of ensuring he wouldn’t be found by anyone else.

Even the war unicorn following us, now fully saddled and armored, did not help me keep my new identity in mind. We had been traveling together too long now.

I suppose I should have gotten some satisfaction from the fact I could now maintain not only one, but two disguises without consciously thinking about it. I didn’t. I found it unnerving that I had to remember other people were seeing me differently than I was seeing myself.

I shot a glance at the trollop. As our eyes met, her smile broadened noticeably. She displayed her increased enthusiasm by leaning further out of the window until I began to worry about her falling out… of the window or her dress.

“What did I tell you, kid!” Aahz slapped me enthusiastically on the shoulder and winked lewdly.

“I’d rather she was attracted to me for me as I really am,” I grumbled darkly.

“The price of success, kid,” Aahz responded philosophically. “Well, no matter. We’re here on business, remember?”

“Right,” I said firmly.

I turned to continue our progress, and succeeded only in whacking Aahz soundly in the leg with my sword.

“Hey! Watch it, kid!”

It seemed there was more to this sword-carrying than met the casual eye.

“Sorry, Aahz,” I apologized. “This thing’s a bit point-heavy.”