‘Grrummph! You’ll be the death of me, girl: He studied the board, then went back to
his desk. ‘This will interest you. This morning’s mail. From Mr Clemens -‘
`Oh, my!’
I remember especially two paragraphs:
I agree with you and the Bard, sir; let’s hang them. Hanging its lawyers might not
correct all of this country’s woes but it would be lots of fun and could do no harm
to anyone.
Elsewhere I have noted that the Congress is the only distinct criminal class this
country has. It cannot be mere coincidence that ninty-seven per cent of Congress are
lawyers.
Mr Clemens added that his lecture agency had scheduled him for Kansas City next
winter. ‘I recall that four years ago we failed to rendezvous in Chicago by a week.
Is it possible that you will be in KC next January?’
‘Oh, Father! Could we?’
`School will be in session:
‘Father, you know that I made up all time lost by going to Chicago. You know, too,
that I am first among the girls in my class… and could be first including the boys
if you hadn’t cautioned me about the inadvisability of appearing too smart. But what
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you may not have noticed is that I have enough credits and could have graduated -‘
`-with Tom’s class last week. I noticed. We’ll work on it. Deus volent and the crick
don’t rise. Did you get what you wanted in Butler?’
`I got what I wanted. But not in Butler.’
‘Eh?’
‘I did it, Father. I am no longer virgin.’
His eyebrows shot up. `You have managed to surprise me.’
‘Truly, Father?’ (I didn’t want him to be angry with me… and I thought that he had
implied long back that he would not be.)
‘Truly. Because I thought that you had managed it last Christmas vacation. I have
been waiting the past six months, hoping that you would decide to trust me with it.’
‘Sir, I didn’t even consider keeping it from you. I depend on you.’
`Thank you. Hmm, Maureen, freshly deflowered, you should be examined. Shall I call
your mother?’
‘Oh! Does Mother have to know?’
‘Eventually, yes. But you need not have her examining you, if it frets you -‘
‘It does!’
‘In that case, I’ll take you over to see Dr Chadwick.’
`Father, why must I see Dr Chadwick? It is a natural event, I was not hurt, and I
feel no need.’
We had a polite argument. Father pointed out that an ethical doctor did not treat
members of his own family, especially his women folk. I answered that I was aware of
that… but that I needed no treatment. And back and forth.
After a bit, having made sure that Mother was upstairs for her nap, Father took me
into the surgery, locked the door, and helped me up on to the table, and I found
myself in much the position for examination that I had been in earlier for Charles,
except that this time I had removed only my bloomers.
I suddenly realised that I had become excited.
I tried to suppress it and hoped that Father would not notice it. Even at fifteen I
was not naive about my unusual and possibly unhealthy relations with my father. As
early as twelve I had had the desert-isle daydream with my father as the other
castaway.
But I also knew how strong the taboo was from the Bible, from classic literature,
and from myth. And I remembered all too well how Father quit letting me sit on his
lap, had stopped it completely and utterly, once I reached menarche.
Father put on a pair of rubber gloves. This was something he had started as a result
of the Chicago trip… which had not been to allow Maureen to enjoy the Columbian
Exposition but to permit Father to attend school at Northwestern University in
Evanston in order to get up to date on Professeur Pasteur’s germ theories.
Father had always been strong for soap and water, but he bad had no science to back
up his attitudes. His preceptor, Dr Phillips, had started to practise in. 1850, and