Carlos Castaneda’s Don Juan’s Teachings

(NOTE: Michael wrote all of that for me as a sample I could send. Below are the parts I changed in bold to fit my experience along with removed or changed words in parenthesis.)

R: …Success at this level of achievement confirms that the candidate is committed and this, I’m told, opens the path to the full second attention which is said to dramatically increase(s) knowledge, and further test the impeccability of the candidate. Beyond the second attention, it’s said, is the third attention where whole knowledge based on crystal-clear experiences is achieved. The “power of the universe,” although it flows, I’m told, to the candidate in the form of the second attention as a bridge, reside(s), I’m told, fully in the third attention. I’m told that, in order to travel into and experience the third attention, most of the human form of dependencies are required to be lost, or the conscious energy of an individual’s sentience cannot be sufficiently coherent to intend, travel, and navigate.

R: Development of a self to this level, truly, must mean(s) freedom from the Eagle. The “gift” of the Eagle, freedom, (is) could really NOT be a gift at all because each of us, as candidates, would have to earn that freedom. Said in that manner, freedom would be (is) a reward from causation rather than a gift, and it must require(s) significant time and understanding, even for the most committed, to achieve this progression of self-development, or so I believe.

R: (person’s name), as you might gather, many who enter this process as a means of personal development do so on initial curiosity, however, (few master it)Who masters it? (and) Even at the level of contact with others that I have, I truly know of (only)… none (that’s because I’m so stuck in practicality that I can’t yet even acknowledge the one I honestly believe that I do know of). The question is, what is your level of interest? Where do you see yourself as a matter of your own situation? What is your goal through this contact?

M: COMMENT: Very, very appropriate. Very self-impeccable, for more than one reason. Congratulations.

———— R: N0TE: This begins what becomes know as my “rant.” It leads, in a few months time, and after at least one more rant on my part, to what is, for me, a major breakthrough in how I view myself in the world. I’ve taking out much of the personal stuff as it is too much self-induldgence (understatement), but for completeness sake, I’ve left enough to make Michael’s replies relevant. I actually wrote the whole thing as one long self-induldging paragraph. This contains, then, most of the rant and Michael’s comments and my comments to comments, interspersed reply. But there is a problem with putting it into the style of “already answered” as opposed to my whole E-mail and then Michael’s interspersed answer. The problem is that, after writing the rant, I E-mailed again twice before receiving the reply. That was an attempt to soften the harshness of what I wrote and acknowledge that I understood at least part of my foolishness. As I now don’t know where else to put the “after rant” E-mail just described, I’ll put it first. These two also contain Michael’s reply, so, this is all ahead of where it should be. The only way to make it in the order it was written would be to include the rant, then the two added preemptive notes, then the rant again plus Michael’s interspersed comments, then my comments to his comments … I’m trying to make this condensed and still work. I’ve added [] sections to try and explain more. Here goes with the two after rant E-mails and one reply:

R: From page five of your/my E-mails compiled you said: “Just as we can assume and develop anything (positive or negative) we are free to go into self-denial, even self-denigration, and write off anything to the extent that nothing will be accomplished for ourselves. We tend to learn in fits and starts on occasion, and it requires a true commit to ‘the way’. One element has been really profound: the more I have evolved the further down the crater becomes, if I slip off ‘the way.'”

R: Thank you, have been re reading [old E-mails]

R: Again I felt the “need” to answer my own last E-mail [the rant that follows] myself before reading [your] expected next notes [answering my rant].

R: I will hold my breath and go look for them [your reply] now.

M: I’m quite certain that you have been holding your breath …

[and here then, it is … the rant … with reply interspersed] Subject: Re: a hellish mood revealed:

M: Hummm. I wonder “how” one can be hellish and use the preface “dear” … ? Seems like a contradiction.

R: Dear Michael,

R: I was feeling rather stupid for having bought Ayn Rand’s book, Atlas Somethinged, today. I don’t really give a damn about finding out who Ayn Rand is or what she thought. It was a patronizing act on my part. Yes, I’m in a hellish mood right now and probably shouldn’t be writing, … so I will.

M: Oh my. Where does this bipolar intensity come from? This is really self-defeating by it’s implication, but I’m pleased to have you exhibit it.

R: I… (bla bla bla, about 500 words acknowledging and complaining about my then life situation)

M: Summarized this only boils down to “I’ve made some bad and rattled decisions”. Only your negative emotions are the issue, the rest is just structural management stuff. Objective learning of the lessons is not possible when embraced in negative emotions, by observation. Learning the lessons of negative experiences immediately turns the negative into a positive since something important has been learned. This is observed not to be possible within the construct of negative emotions.

R: and I’ll be damned if I’m going to spend five cents on a (“f” word deleted) idiot know-it-all doctor who basically was just some spoiled kid who studied a bunch of crap in school and was then told he could go out and practice “medicine” when, through all of that, he was never required even once to take a single solitary course on FOOD/NUTRITION … ever!!!

M: You probably don’t have to spend anything. By law, there are no-cost avenues available, and your blatantly emotional judgement of everyone, just because they are within the western system of medicine is about as warped as saying “there is no one in society who’s worth a damn,” (which is a form of direct self-condemnation since you are in society) and many in medicine, just like many in science or any informed disciplined effort, even artists, work their way into success.

M: We know less about food and nutrition than might be suspected. Nathan Pritikin founded his approach on studying the nutrition of cultures that had a high proportion of centurions, particularly in primitive cultures. It turned out that his studies were flawed, and they didn’t work although it required 20 years to learn this. In Japan, it has been thought for a long time that their diet caused the better-health result than has been experienced in most of the developed Western cultures. Now, we learn by hard data, that their incidence of heart attacks, strokes, cancer, et al, essentially matches ours. The stress of the imploded economy, the tension in every day lives, has made the impact: diet had nothing to do with the prior-suspected results. Those who struggle for ‘the truth’ tend to follow false premises something making themselves self-important, that they know more in all aspects, than all common wisdom which although flawed, is not wholly irrelevant.

M: We know that moderation in alcoholic consumption, MODERATION, is healthy. The body itself converts certain foods into internal alcohol. The acid and enzymes in wine and beer – in MODERATION – promote digestion and health and the salicylic acid in processed aspirin is also contained in wine, that when taken in MODERATION assists in cleansing arterial plaque, and the reports are firm and based on decades of data.

M: Accordingly, your rant may be emotionally satisfying to you, however it seems that the truth is illusive for you and probably negated by negative emotions that in turn can only block objectivity.

R: And your petty tyrant argument was pretty weak if you ask me, which you didn’t. But who can blame you with the screwed up society we live in where I could probably have you arrested if you recommended anything other than the spoiled little (fatherless person and “f” word deleted… boy, I was really ranting … b f idiot … gosh!) idiot know-it-all doctors after telling you what I did about my condition — impeccably diagnosed by me!

M: Since you have made yourself your own tyrant, in this dialogue, it’s at the least, well, interesting. You might consider this thought: the act of healing comes from energy that individuals can develop. This energy is organically derived, for the most part, and healing moves about healthy energy, one could say, into unhealthy areas requiring repair.