as one loves his old home. There is no peace for me like the peace I
feel when I am there.”
We talked along for half an hour, and then I noticed that he looked
tired, and spoke of it.
“Tired?” he said. “Well, I should think so. And now I will tell you all
about it, since you have treated me so well. I am the spirit of the
Petrified Man that lies across the street there in the museum. I am the
ghost of the Cardiff Giant. I can have no rest, no peace, till they have
given that poor body burial again. Now what was the most natural thing
for me to do, to make men satisfy this wish? Terrify them into it!
haunt the place where the body lay! So I haunted the museum night after
night. I even got other spirits to help me. But it did no good, for
nobody ever came to the museum at midnight. Then it occurred to me to
come over the way and haunt this place a little. I felt that if I ever
got a hearing I must succeed, for I had the most efficient company that
perdition could furnish. Night after night we have shivered around
through these mildewed halls, dragging chains, groaning, whispering,
tramping up and down stairs, till, to tell you the truth, I am almost
worn out. But when I saw a light in your room to-night I roused my
energies again and went at it with a deal of the old freshness. But I am
tired out–entirely fagged out. Give me, I beseech you, give me some
hope!” I lit off my perch in a burst of excitement, and exclaimed:
“This transcends everything! everything that ever did occur! Why you
poor blundering old fossil, you have had all your trouble for nothing–
you have been haunting a plaster cast of yourself–the real Cardiff Giant
is in Albany! –[A fact. The original fraud was ingeniously and
fraudfully duplicated, and exhibited in New York as the “only genuine”
Cardiff Giant (to the unspeakable disgust of the owners of the real
colossus) at the very same time that the latter was drawing crowds at a
museum is Albany,]– Confound it, don’t you know your own remains?”
I never saw such an eloquent look of shame, of pitiable humiliation,
overspread a countenance before.
The Petrified Man rose slowly to his feet, and said:
“Honestly, is that true?”
“As true as I am sitting here.”
He took the pipe from his mouth and laid it on the mantel, then stood
irresolute a moment (unconsciously, from old habit, thrusting his hands
where his pantaloons pockets should have been, and meditatively dropping
his chin on his breast); and finally said:
“Well-I never felt so absurd before. The Petrified Man has sold
everybody else, and now the mean fraud has ended by selling its own
ghost! My son, if there is any charity left in your heart for a poor
friendless phantom like me, don’t let this get out. Think how you would
feel if you had made such an ass of yourself.”
I heard his stately tramp die away, step by step down the stairs and out
into the deserted street, and felt sorry that he was gone, poor fellow–
and sorrier still that he had carried off my red blanket and my bath-tub.
THE CAPITOLINE VENUS
CHAPTER I
[Scene-An Artist’s Studio in Rome.]
“Oh, George, I do love you!”
“Bless your dear heart, Mary, I know that–why is your father so
obdurate?”
“George, he means well, but art is folly to him–he only understands
groceries. He thinks you would starve me.”
“Confound his wisdom–it savors of inspiration. Why am I not a money-
making bowelless grocer, instead of a divinely gifted sculptor with
nothing to eat?”
“Do not despond, Georgy, dear–all his prejudices will fade away as soon
as you shall have acquired fifty thousand dol–”
“Fifty thousand demons! Child, I am in arrears for my board!”
CHAPTER II
[Scene-A Dwelling in Rome.]
“My dear sir, it is useless to talk. I haven’t anything against you, but
I can’t let my daughter marry a hash of love, art, and starvation–I