The Gilded Age by Mark Twain and Charles Dudley Warner

“Half three!”

“Quarter three!”

“Mark under wa-a-ter three!”

“Half twain!”

“Quarter twain!—–”

Davis pulled a couple of ropes–there was a jingling of small bells far

below, the boat’s speed slackened, and the pent steam began to whistle

and the gauge-cocks to scream:

“By the mark twain!”

“Quar–ter–her–er–less twain!”

“Eight and a half!”

“Eight feet!”

“Seven-ana-half!”

Another jingling of little bells and the wheels ceased turning

altogether. The whistling of the steam was something frightful now–it

almost drowned all other noises.

“Stand by to meet her!”

George had the wheel hard down and was standing on a spoke.

“All ready!”

The, boat hesitated seemed to hold her breath, as did the captain and

pilots–and then she began to fall away to starboard and every eye

lighted:

“Now then!–meet her! meet her! Snatch her!”

The wheel flew to port so fast that the spokes blended into a spider-web

–the swing of the boat subsided–she steadied herself—-

“Seven feet!”

“Sev–six and a half!”

“Six feet! Six f—-”

Bang ! She hit the bottom! George shouted through the tube:

Spread her wide open! Whale it at her!”

Pow-wow-chow! The escape-pipes belched snowy pillars of steam aloft, the

boat ground and surged and trembled–and slid over into—-

“M-a-r-k twain!”

“Quarter-her—-”

“Tap! tap! tap!” (to signify “Lay in the leads”)

“And away she went, flying up the willow shore, with the whole silver sea

of the Mississippi stretching abroad on every hand.

No Amaranth in sight!

“Ha-ha, boys, we took a couple of tricks that time!” said the captain.

And just at that moment a red glare appeared in the head of the chute and

the Amaranth came springing after them!

“Well, I swear!”

“Jim, what is the meaning of that?”

“I’ll tell you what’s the meaning of it. That hail we had at Napoleon

was Wash Hastings, wanting to come to Cairo–and we didn’t stop. He’s in

that pilot house, now, showing those mud turtles how to hunt for easy

water.”

“That’s it! I thought it wasn’t any slouch that was running that middle

bar in Hog-eye Bend. If it’s Wash Hastings–well, what he don’t know

about the river ain’t worth knowing–a regular gold-leaf, kid-glove,

diamond breastpin pilot Wash Hastings is. We won’t take any tricks off

of him, old man!”

“I wish I’d a stopped for him, that’s all.”

The Amaranth was within three hundred yards of the Boreas, and still

gaining. The “old man” spoke through the tube:

“What is she-carrying now?”

“A hundred and sixty-five, sir!”

“How’s your wood?”

“Pine all out-cypress half gone-eating up cotton-wood like pie!”

“Break into that rosin on the main deck-pile it in, the boat can pay for

it!”

Soon the boat was plunging and quivering and screaming more madly than

ever. But the Amaranth’s head was almost abreast the Boreas’s stern:

“How’s your steam, now, Harry?”

“Hundred and eighty-two, sir!”

“Break up the casks of bacon in the forrard hold! Pile it in! Levy on

that turpentine in the fantail-drench every stick of wood with it!”

The boat was a moving earthquake by this time:

“How is she now?”

“A hundred and ninety-six and still a-swelling!–water, below the middle

gauge-cocks!–carrying every pound she can stand!–nigger roosting on the

safety-valve!”

“Good! How’s your draft?”

“Bully! Every time a nigger heaves a stick of wood into the furnace he

goes out the chimney, with it!”

The Amaranth drew steadily up till her jack-staff breasted the Boreas’s

wheel-house–climbed along inch by inch till her chimneys breasted it–

crept along, further and further, till the boats were wheel to wheel–and

then they, closed up with a heavy jolt and locked together tight and fast

in the middle of the big river under the flooding moonlight! A roar and

a hurrah went up from the crowded decks of both steamers–all hands

rushed to the guards to look and shout and gesticulate–the weight

careened the vessels over toward each other–officers flew hither and

thither cursing and storming, trying to drive the people amidships–both

captains were leaning over their railings shaking their fists, swearing

and threatening–black volumes of smoke rolled up and canopied the

scene,–delivering a rain of sparks upon the vessels–two pistol shots

rang out, and both captains dodged unhurt and the packed masses of

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