The Gilded Age by Mark Twain and Charles Dudley Warner

and I, General, might have chosen a different destiny for them, under the

Constitution, yet Providence knows best.”

“You can’t do much with ’em,” interrupted Col. Sellers. “They are a

speculating race, sir, disinclined to work for white folks without

security, planning how to live by only working for themselves. Idle,

sir, there’s my garden just a ruin of weeds. Nothing practical in ’em.”

“There is some truth in your observation, Colonel, but you must educate

them.”

“You educate the niggro and you make him more speculating than he was

before. If he won’t stick to any industry except for himself now, what

will he do then?”

“But, Colonel, the negro when educated will be more able to make his

speculations fruitful.”

“Never, sir, never. He would only have a wider scope to injure himself.

A niggro has no grasp, sir. Now, a white man can conceive great

operations, and carry them out; a niggro can’t.”

“Still,” replied the Senator, “granting that he might injure himself in a

worldly point of view, his elevation through education would multiply his

chances for the hereafter–which is the important thing after all,

Colonel. And no matter what the result is, we must fulfill our duty by

this being.”

“I’d elevate his soul,” promptly responded the Colonel; “that’s just it;

you can’t make his soul too immortal, but I wouldn’t touch him, himself.

Yes, sir! make his soul immortal, but don’t disturb the niggro as he

is.”

Of course one of the entertainments offered the Senator was a public

reception, held in the court house, at which he made a speech to his

fellow citizens. Col. Sellers was master of ceremonies. He escorted the

band from the city hotel to Gen. Boswell’s; he marshalled the procession

of Masons, of Odd Fellows, and of Firemen, the Good Templars, the Sons of

Temperance, the Cadets of Temperance, the Daughters of Rebecca, the

Sunday School children, and citizens generally, which followed the

Senator to the court house; he bustled about the room long after every

one else was seated, and loudly cried “Order!” in the dead silence which

preceded the introduction of the Senator by Gen. Boswell. The occasion

was one to call out his finest powers of personal appearance, and one he

long dwelt on with pleasure.

This not being an edition of the Congressional Globe it is impossible to

give Senator Dilworthy’s speech in full. He began somewhat as follows:

“Fellow citizens: It gives me great pleasure to thus meet and mingle with

you, to lay aside for a moment the heavy duties of an official and

burdensome station, and confer in familiar converse with my friends in

your great state. The good opinion of my fellow citizens of all sections

is the sweetest solace in all my anxieties. I look forward with longing

to the time when I can lay aside the cares of office–” [“dam sight,”

shouted a tipsy fellow near the door. Cries of “put him out.”]

“My friends, do not remove him. Let the misguided man stay. I see that

he is a victim of that evil which is swallowing up public virtue and

sapping the foundation of society. As I was saying, when I can lay down

the cares of office and retire to the sweets of private life in some such

sweet, peaceful, intelligent, wide-awake and patriotic place as Hawkeye

(applause). I have traveled much, I have seen all parts of our glorious

union, but I have never seen a lovelier village than yours, or one that

has more signs of commercial and industrial and religious prosperity–

(more applause).”

The Senator then launched into a sketch of our great country, and dwelt

for an hour or more upon its prosperity and the dangers which threatened

it.

He then touched reverently upon the institutions of religion, and upon

the necessity of private purity, if we were to have any public morality.

“I trust,” he said, “that there are children within the sound of my

voice,” and after some remarks to them, the Senator closed with an

apostrophe to “the genius of American Liberty, walking with the Sunday

School in one hand and Temperance in the other up the glorified steps of

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