THE INTRUSION OF JIMMY BY P.G. WODEHOUSE

rest of the company.

From that moment, Jimmy’s troubles began. Charteris was a young man

in whom a passion for the stage was ineradicably implanted. It

mattered nothing to him during these days that the sun shone, that

it was pleasant on the lake, and that Jimmy would have given five

pounds a minute to be allowed to get Molly to himself for half-an-

hour every afternoon. All he knew or cared about was that the local

nobility and gentry were due to arrive at the castle within a week,

and that, as yet, very few of the company even knew their lines.

Having hustled Jimmy into the part of CAPTAIN BROWNE, he gave his

energy free play. He conducted rehearsals with a vigor that

occasionally almost welded the rabble he was coaching into something

approaching coherency. He painted scenery, and left it about–wet,

and people sat on it. He nailed up horseshoes for luck, and they

fell on people. But nothing daunted him. He never rested.

“Mr. Charteris,” said Lady Julia, rather frigidly, after one

energetic rehearsal, “is indefatigable. He whirled me about!”

It was perhaps his greatest triumph, properly considered, that he

had induced Lady Julia to take a part in his piece; but to the born

organizer of amateur theatricals no miracle of this kind is

impossible, and Charteris was one of the most inveterate organizers

in the country. There had been some talk–late at night, in the

billiard room–of his being about to write in a comic footman role

for Sir Thomas; but it had fallen through, not, it was felt, because

Charteris could not have hypnotized his host into undertaking the

part, but rather because Sir Thomas was histrionically unfit.

Mainly as a result of the producer’s energy, Jimmy found himself one

of a crowd, and disliked the sensation. He had not experienced much

difficulty in mastering the scenes in which lie appeared; but

unfortunately those who appeared with him had. It occurred to Jimmy

daily, after he had finished “running through the lines” with a

series of agitated amateurs, male and female, that for all practical

purposes he might just as well have gone to Japan. In this confused

welter of rehearsers, his opportunities of talking with Molly were

infinitesimal. And, worse, she did not appear to mind. She was

cheerful and apparently quite content to be engulfed in a crowd.

Probably, he thought with some melancholy, if she met his eye and

noted in it a distracted gleam, she put it down to the cause that

made other eyes in the company gleam distractedly during this week.

Jimmy began to take a thoroughly jaundiced view of amateur

theatricals, and of these amateur theatricals in particular. He felt

that in the electric flame department of the infernal regions there

should be a special gridiron, reserved exclusively for the man who

invented these performances, so diametrically opposed to the true

spirit of civilization. At the close of each day, he cursed

Charteris with unfailing regularity.

There was another thing that disturbed him. That he should be unable

to talk with Molly was an evil, but a negative evil. It was

supplemented by one that was positive. Even in the midst of the

chaos of rehearsals, he could not help noticing that Molly and Lord

Dreever were very much together. Also–and this was even more

sinister–he observed that both Sir Thomas Blunt and Mr. McEachern

were making determined efforts to foster the state of affairs.

Of this, he had sufficient proof one evening when, after scheming

and plotting in a way that had made the great efforts of Machiavelli

and Eichlieu seem like the work of raw novices, he had cut Molly out

from the throng, and carried her off for the alleged purpose of

helping him feed the chickens. There were, as he had suspected,

chickens attached to the castle. They lived in a little world of

noise and smells at the back of the stables. Bearing an iron pot

full of a poisonous-looking mash, and accompanied by Molly, he had

felt for perhaps a minute and a half like a successful general. It

is difficult to be romantic when you are laden with chicken-feed in

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