Roughing It by Mark Twain

rainbows. Two men who were in advance of us rode through one of these

and for a moment their garments shone with a more than regal splendor.

Why did not Captain Cook have taste enough to call his great discovery

the Rainbow Islands? These charming spectacles are present to you at

every turn; they are common in all the islands; they are visible every

day, and frequently at night also–not the silvery bow we see once in an

age in the States, by moonlight, but barred with all bright and beautiful

colors, like the children of the sun and rain. I saw one of them a few

nights ago. What the sailors call “raindogs”–little patches of rainbow

–are often seen drifting about the heavens in these latitudes, like

stained cathedral windows.

Kealakekua Bay is a little curve like the last kink of a snail-shell,

winding deep into the land, seemingly not more than a mile wide from

shore to shore. It is bounded on one side–where the murder was done–by

a little flat plain, on which stands a cocoanut grove and some ruined

houses; a steep wall of lava, a thousand feet high at the upper end and

three or four hundred at the lower, comes down from the mountain and

bounds the inner extremity of it. From this wall the place takes its

name, Kealakekua, which in the native tongue signifies “The Pathway of

the Gods.” They say, (and still believe, in spite of their liberal

education in Christianity), that the great god Lono, who used to live

upon the hillside, always traveled that causeway when urgent business

connected with heavenly affairs called him down to the seashore in a

hurry.

As the red sun looked across the placid ocean through the tall, clean

stems of the cocoanut trees, like a blooming whiskey bloat through the

bars of a city prison, I went and stood in the edge of the water on the

flat rock pressed by Captain Cook’s feet when the blow was dealt which

took away his life, and tried to picture in my mind the doomed man

struggling in the midst of the multitude of exasperated savages–the men

in the ship crowding to the vessel’s side and gazing in anxious dismay

toward the shore–the–but I discovered that I could not do it.

It was growing dark, the rain began to fall, we could see that the

distant Boomerang was helplessly becalmed at sea, and so I adjourned to

the cheerless little box of a warehouse and sat down to smoke and think,

and wish the ship would make the land–for we had not eaten much for ten

hours and were viciously hungry.

Plain unvarnished history takes the romance out of Captain Cook’s

assassination, and renders a deliberate verdict of justifiable homicide.

Wherever he went among the islands, he was cordially received and

welcomed by the inhabitants, and his ships lavishly supplied with all

manner of food. He returned these kindnesses with insult and ill-

treatment. Perceiving that the people took him for the long vanished and

lamented god Lono, he encouraged them in the delusion for the sake of the

limitless power it gave him; but during the famous disturbance at this

spot, and while he and his comrades were surrounded by fifteen thousand

maddened savages, he received a hurt and betrayed his earthly origin with

a groan. It was his death-warrant. Instantly a shout went up: “He

groans!–he is not a god!” So they closed in upon him and dispatched him.

His flesh was stripped from the bones and burned (except nine pounds of

it which were sent on board the ships). The heart was hung up in a

native hut, where it was found and eaten by three children, who mistook

it for the heart of a dog. One of these children grew to be a very old

man, and died in Honolulu a few years ago. Some of Cook’s bones were

recovered and consigned to the deep by the officers of the ships.

Small blame should attach to the natives for the killing of Cook.

They treated him well. In return, he abused them. He and his men

inflicted bodily injury upon many of them at different times, and killed

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