Roughing It by Mark Twain

strapped under the rider’s thighs would each hold about the bulk of a

child’s primer. They held many and many an important business chapter

and newspaper letter, but these were written on paper as airy and thin as

gold-leaf, nearly, and thus bulk and weight were economized. The stage-

coach traveled about a hundred to a hundred and twenty-five miles a day

(twenty-four hours), the pony-rider about two hundred and fifty. There

were about eighty pony-riders in the saddle all the time, night and day,

stretching in a long, scattering procession from Missouri to California,

forty flying eastward, and forty toward the west, and among them making

four hundred gallant horses earn a stirring livelihood and see a deal of

scenery every single day in the year.

We had had a consuming desire, from the beginning, to see a pony-rider,

but somehow or other all that passed us and all that met us managed to

streak by in the night, and so we heard only a whiz and a hail, and the

swift phantom of the desert was gone before we could get our heads out of

the windows. But now we were expecting one along every moment, and would

see him in broad daylight. Presently the driver exclaims:

“HERE HE COMES!”

Every neck is stretched further, and every eye strained wider. Away

across the endless dead level of the prairie a black speck appears

against the sky, and it is plain that it moves. Well, I should think so!

In a second or two it becomes a horse and rider, rising and falling,

rising and falling–sweeping toward us nearer and nearer–growing more

and more distinct, more and more sharply defined–nearer and still

nearer, and the flutter of the hoofs comes faintly to the ear–another

instant a whoop and a hurrah from our upper deck, a wave of the rider’s

hand, but no reply, and man and horse burst past our excited faces, and

go winging away like a belated fragment of a storm!

So sudden is it all, and so like a flash of unreal fancy, that but for

the flake of white foam left quivering and perishing on a mail-sack after

the vision had flashed by and disappeared, we might have doubted whether

we had seen any actual horse and man at all, maybe.

We rattled through Scott’s Bluffs Pass, by and by. It was along here

somewhere that we first came across genuine and unmistakable alkali water

in the road, and we cordially hailed it as a first-class curiosity, and a

thing to be mentioned with eclat in letters to the ignorant at home.

This water gave the road a soapy appearance, and in many places the

ground looked as if it had been whitewashed. I think the strange alkali

water excited us as much as any wonder we had come upon yet, and I know

we felt very complacent and conceited, and better satisfied with life

after we had added it to our list of things which we had seen and some

other people had not. In a small way we were the same sort of simpletons

as those who climb unnecessarily the perilous peaks of Mont Blanc and the

Matterhorn, and derive no pleasure from it except the reflection that it

isn’t a common experience. But once in a while one of those parties

trips and comes darting down the long mountain-crags in a sitting

posture, making the crusted snow smoke behind him, flitting from bench to

bench, and from terrace to terrace, jarring the earth where he strikes,

and still glancing and flitting on again, sticking an iceberg into

himself every now and then, and tearing his clothes, snatching at things

to save himself, taking hold of trees and fetching them along with him,

roots and all, starting little rocks now and then, then big boulders,

then acres of ice and snow and patches of forest, gathering and still

gathering as he goes, adding and still adding to his massed and sweeping

grandeur as he nears a three thousand-foot precipice, till at last he

waves his hat magnificently and rides into eternity on the back of a

raging and tossing avalanche!

This is all very fine, but let us not be carried away by excitement, but

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