Roughing It by Mark Twain

rudimental fresco–i.e., red and blue mill brands on the flour sacks.

Occasionally, also, the better classes embellished their canvas by

pasting pictures from Harper’s Weekly on them. In many cases, too, the

wealthy and the cultured rose to spittoons and other evidences of a

sumptuous and luxurious taste. [Washoe people take a joke so hard that I

must explain that the above description was only the rule; there were

many honorable exceptions in Carson–plastered ceilings and houses that

had considerable furniture in them.–M. T.]

We had a carpet and a genuine queen’s-ware washbowl. Consequently we

were hated without reserve by the other tenants of the O’Flannigan

“ranch.” When we added a painted oilcloth window curtain, we simply took

our lives into our own hands. To prevent bloodshed I removed up stairs

and took up quarters with the untitled plebeians in one of the fourteen

white pine cot-bedsteads that stood in two long ranks in the one sole

room of which the second story consisted.

It was a jolly company, the fourteen. They were principally voluntary

camp-followers of the Governor, who had joined his retinue by their own

election at New York and San Francisco and came along, feeling that in

the scuffle for little territorial crumbs and offices they could not make

their condition more precarious than it was, and might reasonably expect

to make it better. They were popularly known as the “Irish Brigade,”

though there were only four or five Irishmen among all the Governor’s

retainers.

His good-natured Excellency was much annoyed at the gossip his henchmen

created–especially when there arose a rumor that they were paid

assassins of his, brought along to quietly reduce the democratic vote

when desirable!

Mrs. O’Flannigan was boarding and lodging them at ten dollars a week

apiece, and they were cheerfully giving their notes for it. They were

perfectly satisfied, but Bridget presently found that notes that could

not be discounted were but a feeble constitution for a Carson boarding-

house. So she began to harry the Governor to find employment for the

“Brigade.” Her importunities and theirs together drove him to a gentle

desperation at last, and he finally summoned the Brigade to the presence.

Then, said he:

“Gentlemen, I have planned a lucrative and useful service for you–a

service which will provide you with recreation amid noble landscapes, and

afford you never ceasing opportunities for enriching your minds by

observation and study. I want you to survey a railroad from Carson City

westward to a certain point! When the legislature meets I will have the

necessary bill passed and the remuneration arranged.”

“What, a railroad over the Sierra Nevada Mountains?”

“Well, then, survey it eastward to a certain point!”

He converted them into surveyors, chain-bearers and so on, and turned

them loose in the desert. It was “recreation” with a vengeance!

Recreation on foot, lugging chains through sand and sage-brush, under a

sultry sun and among cattle bones, cayotes and tarantulas.

“Romantic adventure” could go no further. They surveyed very slowly,

very deliberately, very carefully. They returned every night during the

first week, dusty, footsore, tired, and hungry, but very jolly. They

brought in great store of prodigious hairy spiders–tarantulas–and

imprisoned them in covered tumblers up stairs in the “ranch.” After the

first week, they had to camp on the field, for they were getting well

eastward. They made a good many inquiries as to the location of that

indefinite “certain point,” but got no information. At last, to a

peculiarly urgent inquiry of “How far eastward?” Governor Nye

telegraphed back:

“To the Atlantic Ocean, blast you!–and then bridge it and go on!”

This brought back the dusty toilers, who sent in a report and ceased from

their labors. The Governor was always comfortable about it; he said Mrs.

O’Flannigan would hold him for the Brigade’s board anyhow, and he

intended to get what entertainment he could out of the boys; he said,

with his old-time pleasant twinkle, that he meant to survey them into

Utah and then telegraph Brigham to hang them for trespass!

The surveyors brought back more tarantulas with them, and so we had quite

a menagerie arranged along the shelves of the room. Some of these

spiders could straddle over a common saucer with their hairy, muscular

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