Roughing It by Mark Twain

discomforted beyond all endurance and left the Territory. If a brave

officer kept on courageously till his pluck was proven, some pliant

Buchanan or Pierce would remove him and appoint a stick in his place.

In 1857 General Harney came very near being appointed Governor of Utah.

And so it came very near being Harney governor and Cradlebaugh judge!–

two men who never had any idea of fear further than the sort of murky

comprehension of it which they were enabled to gather from the

dictionary. Simply (if for nothing else) for the variety they would have

made in a rather monotonous history of Federal servility and

helplessness, it is a pity they were not fated to hold office together in

Utah.

Up to the date of our visit to Utah, such had been the Territorial

record. The Territorial government established there had been a hopeless

failure, and Brigham Young was the only real power in the land. He was

an absolute monarch–a monarch who defied our President–a monarch who

laughed at our armies when they camped about his capital–a monarch who

received without emotion the news that the august Congress of the United

States had enacted a solemn law against polygamy, and then went forth

calmly and married twenty-five or thirty more wives.

B.

THE MOUNTAIN MEADOWS MASSACRE.

The persecutions which the Mormons suffered so long–and which they

consider they still suffer in not being allowed to govern themselves–

they have endeavored and are still endeavoring to repay. The now almost

forgotten “Mountain Meadows massacre” was their work. It was very famous

in its day. The whole United States rang with its horrors. A few items

will refresh the reader’s memory. A great emigrant train from Missouri

and Arkansas passed through Salt Lake City and a few disaffected Mormons

joined it for the sake of the strong protection it afforded for their

escape. In that matter lay sufficient cause for hot retaliation by the

Mormon chiefs. Besides, these one hundred and forty-five or one hundred

and fifty unsuspecting emigrants being in part from Arkansas, where a

noted Mormon missionary had lately been killed, and in part from

Missouri, a State remembered with execrations as a bitter persecutor of

the saints when they were few and poor and friendless, here were

substantial additional grounds for lack of love for these wayfarers.

And finally, this train was rich, very rich in cattle, horses, mules and

other property–and how could the Mormons consistently keep up their

coveted resemblance to the Israelitish tribes and not seize the “spoil”

of an enemy when the Lord had so manifestly “delivered it into their

hand?”

Wherefore, according to Mrs. C. V. Waite’s entertaining book, “The Mormon

Prophet,” it transpired that–

“A ‘revelation’ from Brigham Young, as Great Grand Archee or God, was

dispatched to President J. C. Haight, Bishop Higbee and J. D. Lee

(adopted son of Brigham), commanding them to raise all the forces they

could muster and trust, follow those cursed Gentiles (so read the

revelation), attack them disguised as Indians, and with the arrows of the

Almighty make a clean sweep of them, and leave none to tell the tale; and

if they needed any assistance they were commanded to hire the Indians as

their allies, promising them a share of the booty. They were to be

neither slothful nor negligent in their duty, and to be punctual in

sending the teams back to him before winter set in, for this was the

mandate of Almighty God.”

The command of the “revelation” was faithfully obeyed. A large party of

Mormons, painted and tricked out as Indians, overtook the train of

emigrant wagons some three hundred miles south of Salt Lake City, and

made an attack. But the emigrants threw up earthworks, made fortresses

of their wagons and defended themselves gallantly and successfully for

five days! Your Missouri or Arkansas gentleman is not much afraid of the

sort of scurvy apologies for “Indians” which the southern part of Utah

affords. He would stand up and fight five hundred of them.

At the end of the five days the Mormons tried military strategy. They

retired to the upper end of the “Meadows,” resumed civilized apparel,

washed off their paint, and then, heavily armed, drove down in wagons to

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